Deacon Pat's Books - Popular Catholic novelist and author!

Deacon Pat's Books - Popular Catholic novelist and author!
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Camino De Santiago

Along with a group very special friends, my brother Tim, and two Priests, we will be walking the Camino de Santiago in Spain beginning in August. Please friend me "Deacon Pat Kearns" on Facebook to follow the journey. I realize with limited internet, Facebook will be the easiest way to share the journey. I will share more on the blog when I return. I am also looking forward to using the experience in the current novel I am work on "Climbing Out of the Darkness."

Monday, November 05, 2007

Listening


What do you do when you really want to help someone but don't know how to help?
Or, you have tried to help and have only made things worse....

Maybe this is more of a problem for a Man than it is for a Woman. I have heard that Men have a unique characteristic that includes wanting to fix things. Given a problem, the first reaction that a man has is to try and find a solution. Well, that is great when there is a solution. When a solution is not easily identified, it can be frustrating for all parties when a man is involved (I guess that is true - reluctantly said .........)

Maybe always wanting to fix things is a problem for me.

Maybe thinking that "my answer is the right answer" is a problem for me. Yes it makes sense to me, it was my answer, but really, who is just like me. It would be quite presumptuous to think that everyone should be like me. (What a boring thought that would be.)

This is probably an area that I must need growth in. You say "Probably," I can feel you laughing right now.....

I think that I need to try to become a better listener. Not a better problem solver, just a better listener....

So often, I think the person who has the answer to their problem, is the person with the problem. My answer would be the solution to the problem if it were my problem, not theirs. So by being a better listener, the person would actually be able to hear themselves, hear their problem, and find their own solution. A solution that makes sense to them....

Ok, I think I am starting to get it.

JUST LISTEN !!!!! Don't always feel the need to speak, Just Listen.

I will work on it....
I have often had the thought that if a person really would like to learn more of the wolrd around them, they need to be observant of the world, listening to others views, and seeing things through others eyes. If a person is always stating their ideas and their views, how can they learn anything new.

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