I often think about how our perceptions are often very much unlike reality.
Liz and I often discuss what we usually see in others is not a true representation of the person, but rather the representation that they (i.e the person) wants to exhibit.
So, if what we see day after day in others isn't really true feelings, true reactions, and a true reflection of their thoughts, how can we ever develop a sense of what normal is?
I often think of so many people that feel inferior, feel that they are ugly, not so smart, not so funny, boring, uncreative, uncoordinated, too skinny, too fat, etc.
What is this sense of inadequacy derived from?
If they are comparing themselves to others, they have been comparing their true reality (since we can be truthful in our own minds) against others carefully camouflaged characteristics.
This is a very damaging situation.
If the person is comparing all their weak qualities (since that is what we are usually the most concerned with), against what we perceive as other persons strong qualities, (since that is what we are usually the most concerned with, or jealous of), can't you see how it wouldn't take long before you start to feel inadequate. Especially since those other people are usually trying very diligently to hide their weaknesses from you, you only see their strengths.
So what does that lead to?
Many people want to feel normal. They want to be just like Jane Doe, the problem is they really don't know Jane Doe, they only know what Jane Doe wants others to know about Jane Doe.
So how do we change this way of thinking?
I think it begins with humility.
By choosing to think that I do have some good qualities, some average qualities, and some baggage and defects also, I get that out in the open right away, at least out in the open in my own mind.
(And guys, if you are having problems identifying your defects, just ask your wife or sister, your defects are not as hidden as you think)
I also should realize that no two people are just alike, nor should desire to be just alike.
Also, finding purpose in our lives, a personal purpose in relation to a plan that is much larger than ourselves. This immediately removes all comparisons to others and I will tell you why.
Since this personal purpose has nothing to do with others, how can I compare myself to others, it isn't their plan of life, it is mine.
The method used to fulfill this plan of life is nothing like another persons method. It is mine and it is between God and Me.
So ponder the idea that you are unlike any other human on earth today, yesterday, and any day in the future.
You have been given a soul and a purpose here on earth unlike any other.
What is your purpose?
It may not have been completely revealed to you as of yet, but if you begin to look back in your life, at the events that have taken place, the people that you have met, the situations that you have encountered, the trials that you have surpassed, and the tragedies that you have endured, there is a pattern, there is a clue to what you have been preparing for.
It really isn't that complicated.
If one is really looking for happiness, purpose, joy, strength, and love, one only has to pursue their personal plan of life.
What is your plan of Life?
Do not try to become who you are not, but do become fully, who you really are.....