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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Self-Centered or Self-Giving?

I have been pondering this question for many days now:
Am I and others more self-centered or
self-giving in our thoughts and our actions?

Even though many of us have the best of intentions, it isn't our intentions that really do anything, it is the result of our actions that actually produce substance or affect anything.

When I look at the experiences of my day, I have to reflect on the question:
Was my day more about giving of self, or serving myself?

To honestly evaluate ourselves and be open to an accurate finding, even if that means a negative result, is the first step to growth based in truth.

I met with an employee yesterday to discuss an incident that clearly she was not the cause of, but her reaction to the incident and how she dealt with it as it was occurring clearly was not of a self-giving nature, but rather a self-serving nature, and one that centered more on Pride than understanding and compassion.

As I began to point this out to her, in what was hopefully a gentle and compassionate way, she began to well-up in tears and stated that she now understood that the outcome could have been different if only she handled the situation differently.

This was the first step toward growth.

Growth comes when we begin identifying our own weaknesses, our own limitations, our own faults, and ACCEPTING AND OWNING THEM, and then making a change in ourselves.

It is pretty easy to help another person to see their faults, but what about identifying and owning ours?

I return to the question:

Is my life more about giving of my self for others,
or is it more about serving myself?

I don't just mean how it appears on the surface, or how we can rationalize our behaviors, but to honesty evaluate our own motivations, conscience or subconscious, and come to a truthful conclusion.

We might just be shocked at what we identify.

However, that is just to starting point for growth......

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